This was my cheap shot at cheering up a friend. Thought it should be posted here for your enjoyment. Enjoy!

It. You don’t have to worry about the gender of random, inanimate objects.

Police. Spanish equates a policewoman to a group of policemen. English gives you “One riot. One Texas ranger.”

Love. Since it is obvious Spanish-speakers like to confuse also, why spoil the fun with “Amar”?

Pez. I thought it was candy.

Shoes. In English, you can’t equate dying with hanging up your shoes on the power lines.

Alphabet. How is “ll” a single letter?

Prayer. In English, you pray to Jesus and no one thinks you’re talking to the guy next to you.

You. It’s foolproof! In English, you can’t call a complete stranger a good friend by accident.

Suffixes. They’re so long that special rules have to be made. You shouldn’t say “el es extremadamente, sumamente, extremadamente grande.”

Names. I would hate to be called Christino because my parents wanted a girl.

Jerk. There is no good Spanish translation when you mean your friend.

Dude. The word just sounds cool.